The ever present panic in my chest flares as his eyes rake over her. I’ve been keeping his attentions occupied, but the more he comes around, the more his gaze wanders. On knowing that there’s nothing me or Emily or even my Ma can do. Ma gives him a stiff but respectful smile, but I know Blaine can see the fear in her eyes. “You look more beautiful every time I see you.” Varela.” He bows his head and kisses Ma’s hand. The evil swirling just below the surface, seeking any opportunity to leak out and obliterate his grand illusion. To anyone else, it would appear polite and even charming, but to me that smile belies exactly what he only wants me to see. Blaine’s inky black gaze settles on her while his lips curl up into a smile. My gut churns, and Ma shuffles over to open it. The moment is ruined when there’s a knock at the door. “I know.” I reach up and clasp her hand with mine. “My beautiful daughter,” she says, her eyes shining with love. Ma shrugs both of us off and pats my cheek with her hand. “That could have something to do with all the cigarettes,” Emily chimes in. But she loves to blame us for her gray hairs. I laugh and shake my head, even though it’s really not funny. “I smoke too much because I’m always worried about the two of you.” She reaches up and tugs on her hair. Although she moved from Brazil at a young age, she still uses her native tongue frequently when she gets hot headed.

She throws her hands up and curses at me in Portuguese. “You’ve been hacking like that for weeks. “You need to go back to the doctor,” I bitch at her. Ma falls into another coughing fit, and my stress comes back full force. Now it’s just the three of us, living like a house with no foundation.

He hasn’t been since I was twelve and he died from a heart attack on Emily’s birthday. Exactly how to stop me from drowning.īut he isn’t here. If he were here right now, he’d know exactly what I should do. The humble voice of a hardworking man who loved and provided for his family. My Ma didn’t know how to handle it, like many other things, so she left it up to dad. Find five things you can smell, hear, see, and touch. Five things, my father’s voice echoes inside my head. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to blink away the pressure behind them. They’ve got no idea, but it’s better that way. The disappointment is plastered all over both their faces every time they see me with Blaine. She glances at my sister Emily across the room as if the very mention of the word mafia might influence her too.

A real chance to get out of this neighborhood and do something with your life. You had the smartest, brightest future ahead of you. “I just don’t understand, Sasha.” She launches into another one of her tirades. I bend down to zip up my boots so she can’t see the expression on my face. “ I don’t like you going out with that guy,” Ma says.

Reaper by a zavarelli read online